The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize