Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Randomize
