Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
I understand Curling. That high.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
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