I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
