I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
We need a shit load of segways right now
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
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