Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Randomize
