Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
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