I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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