I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
