Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize
