I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
