Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize
