Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
