did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
