# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
