He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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