I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
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