so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
