OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Randomize
