That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Randomize
