Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Randomize
