There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
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