Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize
