Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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