covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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