I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
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