I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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