your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
