girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Randomize
