I smell stomach acid.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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