Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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