I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Drunk is not a location!
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
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