Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Randomize
