First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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