loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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