and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
I checked into jail on foursquare
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Randomize
