I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Randomize
