I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
