Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
