All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
he wants to bone in the snuggie
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Randomize
