The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Randomize
