I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
She needs sedatives and a leash
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
