first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
I feel like abortions should bother me more
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
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You. Win. At. Life.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
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