So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
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