That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
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seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
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I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.