i permit you to call me
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Randomize
