Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
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