i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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