I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Randomize
