I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
They have beer where we have blood.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Randomize
