At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
do nipples grow back?
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
