Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
