I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Randomize